The apparent shortage of cucumbers reminds me of something.
To very slightly digress, it reminds me of my sister’s top tip to put a slice of cucumber in a vodka and tonic so it would not be mistaken for a gin and tonic in which slices of lemon bobbed around like ducks in a bath.
In The Importance of Being Earnest (1895) Algernon’s butler (Lane) covers up for him when Algy has scoffed the cucumber sandwiches made for his Aunt Augusta. It’s a well known quotation but may I refresh your memory?
“ALGERNON
Certainly, Aunt Augusta. [Goes over to tea-table.]
LADY BRACKNELL
Won’t you come and sit here, Gwendolen?
GWENDOLEN
Thanks, mamma, I’m quite comfortable where I am.
ALGERNON
[Picking up empty plate in horror.] Good heavens! Lane! Why are there no cucumber sandwiches? I ordered them specially.
LANE
[Gravely.] There were no cucumbers in the market this morning, sir. I went down twice.
ALGERNON
No cucumbers!
LANE
No, sir. Not even for ready money.
ALGERNON
That will do, Lane, thank you.
LANE
Thank you, sir. [Goes out.]
ALGERNON
I am greatly distressed, Aunt Augusta, about there being no cucumbers, not even for ready money.”
I seem to remember, hazily, that something similar happens in Chaucer – remind me. The idea is picked up by AA Milne when Pooh eats the honey he has brought to Eyeore as a birthday present and explains his present is a pot useful for putting things in. In my opinion it is easy to have too many pots useful for putting things in. The things should be thrown away along with the receptacles.
Mulliner Nights (1933) some of you will recall has a story of the same ilk. The MacGuffin is Merryn Mulliner’s wooing of Clarice Mallaby. She challenges him to give her fresh strawberries – important plot point, it is December, and a basket of strawberries must be delivered by month end – latest. Eventually he succeeds but before presenting the fruit is tempted and eats the lot. The story is called The Knightly Quest of Mervyn, should you want to read it.