Observations from the Barons Court Observatory

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Bugles and a Tiger describes John Masters’ time at Sandhurst and serving with the Gurkhas in India in the 1930s. It sets the stage for his second volume when the world is at war: The Road Past Mandalay.

It opens in Syria where the 2nd Battalion of the 4th Gurkhas are fighting the Vichy French. Then there’s a 2 1/2 year interlude during which he sees no action. Much of his time is spent at Staff College in Quetta and the skills he acquires prove essential when he returns to active service. If this sort of thing interests you, an Appendix consists of the Operation Order he wrote in March 1944 setting out how a brigade would be moved into territory occupied by the Japanese in Burma. Here is the sort of detail it goes into.

“27. CIPHERS – Destruction in case of crash

Plane commanders will inform all personnel in the plane, before emplacement, if any man in the plane is carrying cipher documents. In the event of a crash which damages the wireless set beyond repair or kills the operators, the man carrying the ciphers, or the senior person present, will destroy cipher documents. The man burning the ciphers will note the details of the documents burned.”

What follows is an account of the re-taking of Burma by the Forgotten Army. It is a view from the top. Last month, staying in France, I borrowed George MacDonald Fraser’s memoir, Quartered Safe Out Here, a view from the bottom when the author was a private soldier in the Border Regiment in the same campaign. Taken together you get a pretty good idea of the realities of fighting in a harsh climate against a resolute enemy. Jack Masters wrote his account in 1961, GMF in 1993 and the latter freely admits that he cannot remember everything accurately. Nevertheless it is unusual for a good writer to tell his tale as a soldier in the ranks and well worth reading. Members of The Border Regiment came from Cumberland; the vernacular is enjoyable as are the references to a Cumberland family in the 1946 General Election.

“Git hired! Ah doan’t know booger-all about politics, but Ah know the Liberal’s ca’d Roberts, an’ ‘is family’s temperance, so knackers till them. They ‘ed a cellar oot at Naworth, boorstin’ wid the best drink in the coonty, an’ the teetotal boogers poured the lot on’t doon drain! Think Ah’d vote for them? Man, they say if ye coom up at Brampton Court the foorst thing old Roberts says is; “Was there a haroma of drink haboot the haccused, constable?”, an’ if the constable says “Aye, yer woorship, ‘e wez pissed rotten”, then ye’ve ‘ad it. Sod them.”

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My switcheroo from Astra Zeneca to Marks and Spencer has not worked out. At one point M&S fell 20% from my entry point. They have recovered a bit and both Archie Norman (chairman) and Justin King (non-exec director) have bought a few shares. I must sit it out and await events.

In France I sat beside a non-exec of a substantial ($30 billion+) private equity firm. We discussed our investment philosophies. She only invests in managed funds and I hold a few of her picks. I told her I’d bought M&S and she said she’d never invest in an individual company. I said I tried not to do it often – “but at least I don’t read Investors Chronicle”. Her riposte – “that grubby, tip sheet”.

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I think white Rioja is an affordable under-rated wine. I was put in my place by a TV wine pundit who completely rubbished it. I mentioned white Malbec from Argentina and, gratifyingly, she had never heard of it but she did mark me as being the man who orders the House White. A pity she wasn’t at L’Auberge du Bon Laboureur at Chenonceaux where we broke the drive back and had a sublime white Chinon – a wine I’d never rated.

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Fortunately Robert passed his driving test before we went to France and did most of the driving. Only one speeding ticket … so far.

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Mild weather and lots of rain have made for a bumper mushroom season this autumn. Foraging is discouraged. Is this because it stops the spores reproducing – surely not – or ‘cos other people will not have the pleasure of seeing them? I think the latter. I love a field mushroom fried lavishly in butter on toast. Robert demurs.

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My plan is to update this website with slightly longer posts at the weekend.

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