Forgive me, for I have sinned; sins of omission are my special weakness. Earlier this summer I moaned about the bus replacement service after Ariadne auf Naxos at Longborough. You were entitled to think that I was on that bus when the reality is that I went back with my host in an ultra-comfy BMW.
Likewise, I omitted to mention that I’d seen something new on my walk to Richmond on Monday. Have you ever seen a Quarkini and if you did would you slip into it for a swim at the Eden Roc , tickle its furry ears or assume it’s a hedge fund algorithm?
I’ve only once had a swim at the Eden Roc. It was an August Bank Holiday weekend. Went on the ultra-fashionable BA Friday evening flight from Heathrow to Nice rubbing shoulders with those not quite rich enough to fly private. Taxi to Hotel Versailles in Villefranche. Mooched around on Saturday before opera at the glorious Villa Ephrussi followed by al fresco dinner. Drinks on the deck at hotel until someone has a brainwave at 2.00 am – hey, let’s go to Jimmy’z (in Monte Carlo).
It was unbearable … the people, the noise … so I went out for a breath of air. Next thing, it was 7.00 am and I was on a bench outside the casino. Quick taxi transfer back to Villefranche hotel, pack bag and store same in friend’s room. Down to the port for speed boat transfer to the Eden Roc for lunch and swim. Lunch interrupted by testy Villefranche hotelier calling my friend to report that I had left hotel with bill unpaid.
After refreshing swim two things happened in quick succession. Hotel flunkey asked for my room number and when told not staying demanded Euros 50 per head for my party (there were eight of us). I suavely said that I would bear that in mind next time and sprang lithely into speedboat. It was, I suppose, justice of a kind that I slipped and fell very heavily and painfully on my bum into the boat.
Back to hotel to pick up bag, pay bill to apologetic hotel staff. Balcony picnic outside friend’s room which was more liquid than solid. Flight to London. Monday, twelve hour solo shift in office which was busier than any previous Bank Holiday with Wagnerian hangover.
And this is a Quarkini.
Quarkini! And there was I thinking it was a new style of swimwear of minuscule dimensions. Quark = sub-atomic particle (theoretical) but as yet not observed but mathematically proven.
My kinda bikini!
As for that weekend in Villefranche and Cap d’Antibes, never to be forgotten, thank you.
Something of a classic Bellew weekend then.