Scrambled Eggs

Brexit was inevitable. Breakfast in the British Isles is not like breakfast in Europe. If you can’t agree about brekker it’s time to part brass rags.

To digress:

When I say Europe I mean Northern Europe; countries with no green in their flags, people who wear topcoats in winter. An Italian breakfast, unless you are in a swanky hotel, is not the thing at all; a pastry filled with cream or jam accompanied by a super-strong espresso. If feeling a little delicate it can be turbo-charged (like our PMs vision for the UK economy) by ordering a caffè corretto con grappa. To digress again, some years ago in Venice when ordering an early coffee I asked Robert what he’d like; “same as you.” I had two cups of coffee that morning.

 

The Northern European breakfast has good coffee, a selection of breads made with a variety of grains, often inseminated with seeds, meats and cheeses, hard-boiled eggs, yogurts, muesli and fruit. The breakfasts in Norway were especially good but this year Moldova and Ukraine were well up to standard.

 

Now we must turn to the British breakfast and I sense readers from this sceptred isle about to take umbrage if a say a word agin a BB. Hold your horses, I must digress to give you the full sceptre plus island quote:

 

This royal throne of kings, this sceptred isle,
This earth of majesty, this seat of Mars,
This other Eden, demi-paradise,
This fortress built by Nature for herself
Against infection and the hand of war,
This happy breed of men, this little world,
This precious stone set in the silver sea,
Which serves it in the office of a wall
Or as a moat defensive to a house,
Against the envy of less happier lands,–
This blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England.
(Richard II, Shakespeare)

 

Boris Johnson is a good purveyor of optimism but Shakespeare got there first. Now back to brekker. Black pudding, kippers, baked beans, tomatoes, mushrooms, fried bread, fried eggs, scrambled eggs, bacon, and sausages are the backbone of a British breakfast. It may not be advisable to indulge if the plan for the day is to take a look at The Times crossword but, golly, if you are walking up to the Devil’s Pulpit it’s just the ticket.

 

The weakest point in a buffet brekker are the scrambled eggs. Scrambled eggs should be freshly made to order. If I may digress, when I was staying in The Pacific-Union Club in San Francisco the other day, they were so health-conscious that they offered scramblers made of whites only (or was that a club rule?). The Speech House scramblers were solidified, dry bricks made, perhaps, of eggs. But yesterday morning they were lovely and runny; the apotheosis of a scrambled egg ; R and I had them instead of a fried egg. Why the improvement? A different chef and the waitress told me how pleased he’d be that we’d noticed. So while I wave a flag for a good British fry-up it does need to be cooked with care. Something I haven’t mentioned is soda bread, a sine qua non of breakfast in Ireland. When the Good Lord chucked down manna he was thinking soda bread.

 

2 comments

  1. Christopher,

    Breakfasts definitely are more robust the further west one travels.

    Of course Irish breakfasts are the best artery blockers in Europe: and you didn’t even mention the fried potato bread (but no beans; they are English impostors).

    For Irish breakfasteers on the move, there is the delight of being able to avail of the jumbo breakfast roll. Irish funnyman Pat Shortt has even written a ballad on same: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EIIWKA_h12Q

    Non-Irish followers may need a translation.

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